This weekend has been a revelation. Yesterday MKL and I visited with my cousin and her husband, and met their 5-week-old twins, the adorable Hannah and Solomon. Weighing in at 4 lbs, 13 oz and 5 lbs, 4 oz respectively, these two are tiny bundles of perfection. They were born by emergency c-section 8 weeks before their due date, and they spent nearly a month in the NICU. I have to admit, I expected them to look a little frail, but they are absolutely perfect in every way. When we arrived they had just eaten, so they were content and sleepy – perfect baby-holding conditions. MKL and I washed our hands the minute we had greeted the adults, and grabbed a baby. And there we sat, catching up with family, each cradling a tiny miracle for the next few hours, and we couldn’t have been happier. It made us both wish we could fast forward through the next five months so that we can hold our own little miracle.
Today I awoke in a fantastic mood. The sun has been shining for the first time in what seems like weeks, and I had a whole day to spend with MKL – quality time that we haven’t had for what seems like months. We’ve been pretty busy lately, and between our schedule and my need to still take it easy (yes, the bleeding is still here…grr), I also haven’t spent very much time with my bff, a woman who feeds my soul in a way I could never put into words. This morning we exchanged “I miss you” texts that threw me into a fit of hysterical crying mixed with laughter. It started when a sweet message she sent made me tear up, and then I started to giggle at the mere notion of the tears, which then gave way to full-on guffaws interlaced with sobs that made me lose my breath. I looked up at the tv to see a rerun of Sex and the City – the episode where Miranda had just given birth to Brady and was having a hard time connecting with her non-mom friends. I cried more, laughed more at myself, let MKL take a picture of the messy me, and changed the channel. And then I realized that soon our bff will be right here, holding our baby and experiencing the same joy Hannah and Solomon gave us yesterday. As much as I miss our gym dates, long walks, and dinners out, I’m just as excited to share the monkey with her.
The bleeding has had me a little down in the dumps lately. I asked MKL the other day when this pregnancy will become fun. The answer came this weekend, and the answer is now. In what seems like the last three or four days, my belly has popped out. The bump is officially here and visible. And another new development: I can feel the baby move. No discernible kicks or anything…the monkey’s still too small for that. But every now and then my belly flutters, signaling yet another special dance. I’m in a show next weekend, so I’ve been singing a lot and the baby seems to love it. I’m picturing this now sweet-potato-sized monkey choreographing moves just for us whenever I start to sing and when MKL talks to my belly each morning (my absolute favorite part of the day). I don’t really care that I feel like I’ve been on my period for a month, just in the time of my life when I should be given a break. It doesn’t matter that my “take it easy” status has kept me from seeing the inside of the gym, or that I can’t walk more than a block or two, or even that it takes me an hour to find something to wear each morning. This baby is real. It’s really coming, and playing hostess to it is the most fun I’ve ever had.