are you my moms?

the musings of yet another lesbian couple on the journey of mother(s)hood

The First 8 Weeks October 6, 2012

Filed under: Rigby — areyoumymoms @ 1:25 am
Tags: , ,

It’s amazing how quickly a day can fly by, even when you’re awake for most of it.  I’ve meant to post something – anything – for weeks now and there just never seems to be time.  I’ve hated that the last thing you heard from me was a rant about my boobs.  So much has happened since I gave birth that it seems a shame to leave you thinking the only result of Rigby’s blessed arrival is that I now have a love/hate relationship with my tits.  To sum up our experiences over the last (almost) 8 weeks would be impossible…well, it would at least be a very long post.  So I’ll try to break it up into a few palatable chunks.  I’ve started drafts on a few different topics, so provided that his majesty is getting close to a nighttime sleep schedule, I’ll be posting soon on everything from our favorite baby-related products to why I wish we could all have babies in Canada.  First up, a little bit about our boy.

Our boy Rigby is special.  I know every child is special, and every parent thinks their kid hung the moon.  But I promise that if you held our son, you’d know what I’m talking about.  First, there’s the hair.  Rigby has more hair than most full-grown men.  It’s longer than MKL’s, and has highlights that my salon couldn’t replicate with all the chemicals and color wheels in their arsenal.  Not a public outing goes by when we don’t hear passersby giggling or complimenting his locks.  He makes people smile wherever he goes.  Just when you’ve gotten used to the wonder of his hair, he will throw a charming little grin your way and melt your heart.  And then there’s his temperament.  I want to disclose that typing this next sentence scares me…like I’m tipping my hand.  But here goes: Rigby is an exceedingly happy baby.  If he’s crying, something needs attention.  A crying Rigby is a hungry, wet, or tired Rigby.  He entertains himself already – kicking, playing, and talking to any high-contrast or noisy object set before him.  As everyone in our world meets him for the first time, we find ourselves repeating phrases like, “We’re not really sure where the hair came from, but we love it” and “Yep – for the most part, he’s always this good.”  Cute, healthy, happy.  Who could ever ask for more?

I’ve wanted a baby for a long time.  I’ve prayed for the day when I’d be folding tiny laundry, lugging a carrier around, and picking up toys as they seem to scatter themselves around the house.  I pictured bedtime, and saw myself checking on a sleeping infant, all tucked neatly into footie pajamas.  I wished for sleep-deprived feedings in the middle of the night – dream dates with my special girl or guy.  I spent hours imagining what it would be like to have all day to stare at a baby, to memorize his or her unique coos and cries, and to be one of the people a baby looks to for comfort.

All of these prayers have been answered, and then some.  These days my favorite pastime is staring into Rigby’s sweet face; my heart nearly bursts out of my chest when he smiles at me.  I do victory dances several times a day when I’m able to calm his cries, or can diagnose his need by watching how he twists and turns his body.  MKL and I swell with pride as our genius infant sees himself in a toy’s mirror reflection, or turns his head at the sound of our voices.  He changes and learns new skills every day; today – grabbing a rattle with his own little hands.  Tomorrow – splitting atoms.  Sometimes I swear I can hear Marlin Perkins’ voice in the background, as if Wild Kingdom is here to document the growth and development of this very special creature.

Fortunately, no Marlin.  That’d be awkward A) as he died when I was 10 and B) because my son is not a lemur.  But even better, MKL is all about a camera, and has been taking amazing pictures of our son.  At first I thought she was a little obsessed.  Adorable, but obsessed.  And then it occurred to me that pretty soon I’ll have to go back to work and I will rely on MKL to document any significant (or insignificant but cute) moment with Rigby.  I, like Steven Tyler, don’t wanna miss a thing.  [More about my acute fear of the end of maternity leave in a future post…I can’t face it tonight.]

About a week after Rigby was born, MKL and I celebrated our 10th anniversary.  In the last decade, we’ve been through our fair share of challenges.  We’ve come through it as stronger people and a healthier partnership in the end.  Our bff recently said that we adore one another so much that sometimes it’s painful to watch.  I didn’t realize that I could love someone or something more than I love MKL.  But I do.  Rigby fits into our life like a missing puzzle piece, and while having a child has brough us closer together and magnified our love for each other, I find that I love our little family more than I could ever love one person.  I can’t remember a time when he wasn’t here with us.  And I’m still not sure what I did to deserve this kind of bliss.

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5 Responses to “The First 8 Weeks”

  1. Mrs P Says:

    Rigby is totally adorable! Massive congratulations on your lovely family, I can’t wait for future stories and updates

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  2. Oh my goodness, you’re right!! He does have great hair!!! WOW! Your baby is absolutely beautiful! 🙂

    Like

  3. pepibebe Says:

    Hello, I’m a little late to comment, but just found your blog on the Stirrup Queen blogroll. His head of hair is quite phenomenal! I’ve seen hair like that on Maori and Pacific babies (here in New Zealand), but never fair hair!! I bet he gets some looks indeed. But to be honest, as outstanding as his hair is, I probably wouldn’t have commented – until i read the last paragraph of your post. What you said is beautiful. It’s inspirational. I sincerely feel that is what it will feel like when my wife and I finally get our third-time-lucky child. We’ve gone through two miscarriages in the past year and it’s put us through the emotional fire. But never once have I doubted her love for me, nor mine for her. I think our hearts will just expand to take in whatever children we are lucky enough to be blessed with. Thank you for your words. If you’d like to come hear about our journey, and have time away from all of your hair dressing related duties, please follow us at: http://www.pepibebe.wordpress.com

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